I was looking over some of the recent blogs I wrote and it made me smile that I will have such wonderful memories of our lives documented. Ever since I became a member of Pinterest, I have been reading a lot of blogs and getting wonderful ideas. However, I am tempted to feel inadequate as a mom compared to all these crafty, enthusiastic moms who have it all together. If I didn't know any better, I might even seem like one of those moms at times. The problem is I DO know better! And honestly, I also know that no mom has it all together all of the time.
We do have many fun times but there are plenty of times when we are just sitting around the house and I am trying not to cry because I have three screaming kids running around ( well E doesn't run but she definitely screams) and I have laundry, picking-up, home-school, dishes, dinner, and more laundry to do. Not to mention all the things I should be doing but never get to like dusting and organizing things.
I would love to be super mom who makes healthy meals shaped like palm trees and butterflies everyday. I would love to be the most attentive wife who is always smiling and encouraging while rubbing my husbands feet. I'd love to be a size 2 with a trendy fashion sense,who wears makeup everyday and even goes the extra mile and actually has dry hair! A gourmet chef, a successful career woman, an interior designer who can craft everything myself and only spend 10$ per project.
( Does anyone even know what this is?)
Most importantly I'd love to be a godly woman who never complains, has a consistent walk with God and honors my husband. The truth is I can be some of those things some times ( except the size 2 part, OK the whole fashion part) but there is no way I can give 100% to everything in my life. If my house is sparkly clean when my husband comes home from work it's usually because the kids have watched TV and entertained themselves that day. If I've spent my time doing fun activities with the kids, my house looks like a bomb went off ( usually a laundry bomb). There are also times when I've done both and times when I've done neither. Some days I do feel like a great mommy and some days I cry in my bed at night because I wonder if I was too harsh or neglectful that day. Most days I don't think anything and am just happy to finally lay down and pray for uninterrupted sleep!
Here are some things that help keep me sane (when I remember them.)
1. Keep my priorities in line. For some people this looks different. For me, my top priorities are my relationship with God, my husband, and my children. Recently we've had a lot of changes in our lives. It seems like every time I think of a plan, God has a different one. I've learned in the past year or so that if I can have a walk with God and a strong marriage, then I am successful. If my husband and I can love each other and give our kids a stable home then we are blessed beyond measure and are happier than if we had won the lottery. Date night is a MUST!
2. Stop comparing myself to others. This is hard for me sometimes but Paul said in Phil 4:12 "I know how to be abased, and I know also how to abound: in everything and in all things have I learned the secret both to be filled and to be hungry, both to abound and to be in want." basically it means to be content in whatever situation you are in. There will always be someone who has it better, some who seem to have it better and many who have it way worse.
3.Have a Routine. I would not consider myself an organized person but I actually have a written out family schedule. I have to or things would never get done. It helps me when I feel overwhelmed to have a guideline to go to so I know what we should be doing. It helps keep our days predictable ( but flexible) to minimize meltdowns ( mine and theirs). For me, it eliminates guilt because I have scheduled out a time for me to be on Facebook, Pinterest or my blog. It just helps our days to be a little less chaotic. You can find our family schedule here.
4. Have Devos! In my own strength, I fail every time. It seems impossible sometimes but time with God is a must! I feel defeated when I neglect His Word. We have a routine for the most part so after breakfast is cleaned up, Eden is usually asleep, Luke is at preschool and I sit on the porch with Judah and have devotions while he plays. We have family devotions with the kids before bed and Joey and I also try to read and pray together after the kids are in bed. The best way is just to have a consistent time during the day. If you don't know where to start, it helps to have a bible study or devotional book. I really love Nancy Leigh DeMoss. If you click on her name there is a whole line of great resources. I have really benefited from A Place of Quiet Rest and Lies Women Believe. You can probably even Google those titles and find them cheaper some where else. Right now I am using guideline to read through the Bible and I am in Acts. It helps that I have my own personal theologian I like to call husband but there are many great resources we use. Matthew Henry's commentary on the Whole Bible is very helpful.
5. Keep Going! As a mom, I do not have the luxury to run away and give up. There are days I feel that way but I know that no matter what the struggle is that day, "This to shall pass." and we have a sovereign God to rely on. Take care of yourself too, do things you love, take pictures and just choose to be happy!
I try to remember to laugh out loud everyday with my kids and cherish every second. It goes too fast!!!